navi's dilema
by SharpHermit
Summary: woman am i right guys ?


Link was walking through the woods with navi .She just started to take notice of links appearance ...He looked a little scruffy , He had not bathed in a couple of days either and looked like a stinky homeless man ...upon further inspection that is… like that one weird one that would run around the streets with a pan flute playing the melody of his people .

Oh thoughts were just running through her mind making her unusually silent...

Should I tell him? Oh what if he knows and is just not giving a damn….what should I do what should I do ?...I'll tell him that he stinks ..No Wait...I'll tell him when the timing is right...which should be right in the middle of when he's talking to someone about something important. ...Yeaaaaa…. But what if he doesn't f*cking know and gets his feelings hurt because I said he smells like bad chipotle ….AHHHHHHHH ITS DRIVING ME CRAZY! So she thought to herself.

Link looks towards navi giving her a serious expression ,A long dry booger hanging out of his nose fluttering in the gentle breeze of the forest." navi...are you alright, you're really quiet today."

Oh my fucking sh! T there is an AHHHHH RIGHT IN YOUR NOSE I CAN'T….UGHH! She screamed internally an inside her soul.

"hey listen link theirs something that I need to tell you ." She looked at him with her shoulders back , full of confidence and opened her mouth but was interrupted by a bunch of plant enemies coming out of the ground , link knew just what to do too. He diced those plants like onions. When he was finished he smelt even worse from sweating so much. He looked towards navi.

Alright now what was it you were trying to tell me? Said with concerned look and a light smile showing a piece of blackened corn lodged between the front of his teeth... "well you see …" right then the mail carrier ran by .

"HEEEEYYYY MR LINK I HAVE A LETTER FOR YOU! "He ran towards link giving him a letter from princess ruto.

"Oh thanks man but I kind of have this thing were I don't get involved with woman who smell like deep-sea tuna if you know what I mean."He muttered with a disgusted look on his face that was already dirty and discustsing from poor hygiene so it was kind of like major irony happening here...

"What was that Mr. Link I couldn't hear you?"

"Oh it was nothing sir , thanks for the letter . " as soon as the mail carrier left link buried the letter deep into the dirt .Navi was a little surprised at this.

"Hey link don't you want to know what your fiancé wrote to you? "Links face turned really white. "You know...I think we both knew deep down that i only said ide marry her so she would fork over the stone i needed...I mean I don't like deceiving woman like that but if saving the world meant i'de have to lie one major time to an ugly ,autistic Zora princess then so be it. " he said making a hero pose.

"That's just evil link, She's pretty!"

"Ok then you go marry her then ."He said with his arms folded and navi looking away and avoiding an answer..

"Didn't fuckin think so!"

"N..It..Fuck you link..."She pouted..She hated when she couldn't have the last word on anything and when she were made a fool of..

Suddenly ganondorf approaches on horseback wielding his sword in the air derping his eyes." time to die kid!" he shouted followed by an evil laugh.

The two men starred each other down with lightning forming in the hyrule plains around them with navi repeatedly saying hey hey listen in the back ground, oh she was furious for being ignored turning red till she flipped her shit right after link said …

"Yea not now navi this is more important." navi's screamed really loud, enough to get ganon and links attention. She then injected herself with steroids growing muscular and angry. She let out her battle cry proceeding to kick ganon's a$$ " YOU DON'T INTERUPT ME YOU BASTARD CHILD OF CARROT TOP ." she knees him in the face ten times and forced his face into an ant pile making him eat the ants .he got up after that running away sobbing like a little sissy b!tch. Link watched in amazement …

"Why didn't I do that? "Navi glared at him

"TAKE A FUCKING BATH, YOU SMELL LIKE A$$ !

"Oh I know that navi I was just seeing how long I could go without bathing before you took notice ha-ha. "He laughed a little as navi got closer to him popping her knuckles.

Navi proceeded with beating the shit out link and left after that …it's a fake rumor that this is one of the many reasons that she left link after ocarina of time.

End.


End file.
